Welcome to......
Meet your hostess, Traci.
Everything you needed to know about "Swinging," but didn't know who to ask!
New to "The Lifestyle" and don't know who to trust? Have you been in the lifestyle awhile but you're not meeting the right people? Tired of buying drinks until that couple you met on the internet looks like their pictures? Keep finding the couples that are nothing but "DRAMA?" Look no further...help is here!
You found The Upside Down Pineapple Club! The Upside Down Pineapple Club is a series of classes taught by Traci, The Dominatrix of Ditties, who was The #1 Female Entertainer for The Lifestyle in 2015-2018. She made a living performing her musical comedy show about "the lifestyle" and traveled all over the world performing at Swinger Events, Swinger Cruises, and Nudist Resorts. She shares her hilarious experiences and advice with you, so you can basically "get it on" with more people faster.
Perfect for everyone interested in "The Lifestyle!"
Newbie Swingers
Learn what you need to know about the lifestyle, so you can proceed in the best way for you without damaging your existing relationship.
Seasoned Swingers
Not getting the results you want? I've found seasonsed swingers are either too timid or too pushy. Learn a good balance in this course!
Just Curious?
Learn everything you need to know from the comfort of your home, so you can make an informed decision whether or not "The Lifestyle" is for you.
My Lifestyle Story...
In 2009, I was working as a stand-up comedian and was hired to perform at a clothing optional resort in Tampa, FL. It was cold and I didn't see much, but my comedy resonated with the audience and they requested me to come back in 8 weeks. And then they asked me again, and again, and again. I decided to learn as much as I could about this unique culture so I could put together a comedy show just for them. I spent a weekend at this clothing-optional resort, and my life was changed forever that weekend. I loved it so much, my then-husband and I decided to try a clothing-optional vacation and headed to a resort in Mexico for a week.
We were there about 2 hours, when a guy approached us to "play." It had never occurred to us to do that before. We never talked about it, but the guy pushed us into "playing" with him and his wife. Then we discovered that he was a "predator-type" swinger, and his wife was just "playing along" to keep their marriage going. What turned out to be an innocent trip nearly ended in divorce. Our next encounter was with a seemingly nice couple, that had a fight prior to our first "full swap" encounter. The wife used my husband to make her husband jealous, which made for a horrible trip. And then we found another couple that "fell in love" with us, and tried splitting us up. Our next encounter was with a couple that was all down to play with us. They were incredible fun!
And then...they never talked to us again...
Here is what you get...
11 Videos, 12+ hours of instruction covering the following:
The History of Swinging, and Terminology
In this video, Traci covers a brief history of swinging and some basic terminology you need to know, including unicorns, milfs, gilfs, ggilfs, and bbc!
Presenting Your "Package"
Swingers are highly visual...this video deals with how you can best show off your ass-ets to other singles and couples.
STDs and Other Acronyms You Should Probably Know
STDs (Sexually Transmitted Diseases) is one of the risks that singles and couples take when the begin swinging. Thankfully, Traci knew a Physician/Pharmacist who partially paid for medical school filming porn. Learn what he has to say about STDs and "The Lifestyle."
Reasons to Be In The Lifestyle
Traci covers the myths and misconceptions about swinging, as well as the numerous reasons why millions of couples are choosing to get involved with "The Lifestyle."
Fuck It? or Duck It?
Learn Traci's 5 Magic Questions to determine whether or not a couple is DTF...Down To Fuck. This module alone will keep you focused on meeting who you want to meet.
BDSM and 50 Shades of WTF Did I Just See?
There's a dungeon at your favorite club and you just don't understand what you're seeing! This discussion talks about etiquette in the dungeon and gives an explanation for some of the things you might see.
What You and Your Partner Want
Why are you here? Why is your partner here? You might be surprised what you find out! Here's what you need to know about both of you before you start swinging.
"Chocolate" Rooms
Most swinger events have a chocolate room. Meet 3 of the men that that you might see there, and hear for yourselves their unique perspective on their role in the lifestyle.
Reconciling Your Faith With The Lifestyle
Traci met a retired minister on a swinger cruise some years ago, and begged her to teach a course about reconciling one's faith with the lifestyle. The minister shares the religious history of monogamy, and then her thoughts on religion and The Lifestyle can co-exist.
Slut Shopping
Tips!
Where's the sexy, slutty people? Find out where the swingers are in this video. Learn how to meet sexy singles and couples online as well as in person.
DeFlower and Shower, and Fuck Ups
You got the play date...now what? Discover the best swinger etiquette practices for a successful play date, and what to do when things go south.
Bonus "Lifestyle" Funny Video Links
Bonus HILARIOUS videos about the lifestyle, as well as links to clubs, lifestyle clothing, and other swinger must haves.
Testimonials
Mike & Barb
Houston, TX
We've been swinging for years, but the game is changing. With UDPC, we found a way to expand our string of one night stands to making lifelong friends with some of the most incredible couples you'll ever meet.
KM & JM
Land O Lakes, FL
I wish I had this when I started swinging! We've wasted so much money trying to meet couples that weren't right for us. We learned so much, and Traci covers it quickly and thoroughly.
Craig & Linda
Boise, ID
Straight-forward, no bullsh*t, and spot-on. Traci, your 5 Magic Questions saved us a ton of time and money! Before you, we met okay couples with mixed experiences. Now we meet awesome couples that want to experience The Lifestyle the same way we do. Traci, thank you for being you!
Sam
Rolla, MO
I came to Traci red faced and embarrassed. She made me feel very comfortable. After a few sessions I feel much more accepting of who I am. Never have I been so open and yet so accepted. Traci is amazing.
I have spent over 13+ years and $150,000 acquiring this information. I've invested 13+ years of my life in acquiring this information. I've traveled all over the world with these people, been on 20 swinger cruises, visited close to a hundred clubs and resorts, and had "intimate relations" with countless people. I ended up getting divorced, so then I got to experience "The Lifestyle" as a "Unicorn" for 3+ years. When I got into a new relationship, I had to start all over again as a "newbie swinger." I'm confident The Upside Down Pineapple Club. WILL save you at least $1497 in travel expenses, dinner, drinks, your time, and AT LEAST one bad night of sex because you didn't know how to find the right single/couple for you. I charge $195 for a 90 minute Lifestyle Consulting Session. 11+ hours with me to teach you this material PERSONALLY would cost you over $2000. Check out these special packages so you can start getting what you want out of the lifestyle right away!
